The Immortal Cure: Chase After Chase

Chapter 10

My review so far has been a litany of small complaints, and that’s never a good sign. It could be worse. Small complaints, at least, are not large complaints. There’s no Zuula moment here where there’s a scene so horribly, self-righteously self-indulgent and counter-productive that it becomes a massive black mark on the entire book. It’s theoretically possible that the book will suddenly start to take off and I’ll be quite positive on it overall when we come to the end. But as I’ve said many times before, even though the book can recover, it’s not very likely that it will recover, because if CJ Olsen can write a great second half of a book, why can he not also write a great first half of a book? Why would he wait this long to start trying? Probably he is trying, and this is just the best he’s got.

Not to say the book has been devoid of interesting ideas. There’s some reasonably interesting setting work going on in the background, with the golems and chimeras and airships. But while that is reasonably interesting, it’s not the kind of Morrowind-style wild and imaginative world that makes me happy just to walk through it regardless of how bland the characters I’m following are. This world is a decent foundation with just the most boring house in the world built on top of it. The story needs its characters to be propelling it, and they’re not. There’s no chemistry in the budding romance that’s meant to be at the heart of this story, nor to the friendship with Tatiana that Charlotte left behind – that friendship being her driving motivation to assassinate Harthum rather than just walking away. And that lack of chemistry means that I don’t much care whether or not Charlotte succeeds in her quest, nor am I happy to have any excuse to watch her and Alister go on a wacky steampunk adventure together.

What I’m getting at, here, is that part of the reason this review has been delayed is because of how much I’m not especially excited to get back into it.

So anyway, Alister’s new pet golem crashed through the wall of the pirate tavern where they’ve just recruited Giovanni to the party. Everyone escapes, but Alister does so by firing a little grappling hook from his techno-gauntlet to latch onto the fleeing golem, and ends up getting dragged along the ground long enough to end up badly shredded. He’s unconscious by the time they reach the ship, so Giovanni flies while Charlotte plays nurse. She leaves him in his cot to go and grab a canteen, and that’s when the ship is attacked, presumably by pirates. Charlotte is below-decks and can’t tell. The book really tries to sell me on the romance here, though.

Another whistle echoed down the corridor. Charlotte tucked her head between her knees as The Ephrait shook from an explosion, this one on the opposite side. The Ephrait pitched and the canteen rolled to the wall with a metallic ping. Charlotte squeezed into a tight ball. Her knuckles were white as she held tight to the ship. She suddenly recognized where she sat. It was the same pipes she had clung to her first time boarding The Ephrait.

Alister had sat there, she looked to her right. He promised I would be safe.

She looked up at the canteen.

…I must help him.

The little scene where Alister convinced her not to be so afraid of heights isn’t doing nearly the work this book wants it to, and worse, it doesn’t even particularly have to. Humans have a natural instinct to protect their in-group, and Charlotte and Alister are very definitely in this together. She doesn’t need a special reason to help her allies survive, she just needs to not be a sociopath. Hell, even a sociopath would want to keep what few allies they have in good condition in Charlotte’s situation, provided they were smart enough to think that far ahead (which, granted, many of them are not).

Anyway, there’s another escape scene that doesn’t really bear commenting on because we just did this. Maybe some of the things it establishes are going to come up later, but we just escaped from Callan, escaped from Prawle, and are now escaping from the airspace around Prawle. Every other scene in this book is an escape scene, and every effort at character interaction during or in between has been interminable.

Continue reading “The Immortal Cure: Chase After Chase”

Kickstarter: Finale

When this goes live, the Kickstarter for Heroes of Ramshorn will be a mere four hours from completion. As of the writing, it’s sitting at about $2,500. Funded, and with the Pathfinder stretch goal reached, so that’s a lot of extra work for probably very little profit. I had originally hoped that putting the Pathfinder goal low would allow me to hit it sometime in the doldrums of the midpoint of my project, and thus bring in a new surge. Unfortunately, this Kickstarter proved significantly less successful than the last, so that didn’t happen.

If I can’t raise at least $3,000, preferably from at least 150 backers, then this campaign represents a significant contraction of my audience. Although I do have an outline for a third installment, I’m uncertain whether I will bother actually writing it. We’ll see how I feel after I’ve finished the Pathfinder conversion of Heroes. Certainly in this scenario making Ashes of Ramshorn will be purely to tie things off for the people who really liked Strangers and Heroes, who, regardless of whether or not there were enough of them to make this viable, did all they could reasonably be expected to in order to make these adventures a success.

If I raise between $3,000 and $5,000 from between 150-250 backers, then that represents somewhere between a minor contraction to a minor expansion of my audience. Regardless of exactly where the number lies, it’s definitely worth making a third adventure to see whether or not things are petering out, stagnating, or growing steadily.

When I first started the Kickstarter, I told myself that if I raised over $5,000 from over 250 backers, I could call that an unqualified success. It would mean that I had retained most of my existing audience and seen significant growth. I estimate that I need to make about $7,000 per Kickstarter in order to pay for expenses and, combined with the income my professional GMing makes, be able to become a fulltime creative professional. If I could get over $5,000 on this Kickstarter, that would mean my audience is still growing and strongly suggest that hitting $7,000 reliably might soon be viable.

At this point, it seems very likely that this is not the case. It is still possible, though very unlikely, that I’ll get enough Pathfinder backers at the very last minute to make this Kickstarter comparable to my last one, at which point I have to wonder if I’ve hit my ceiling or if I just need to commit more time to growing my audience and backlog.

The long term strategy runs face-first into a second issue, however: 5e won’t last forever (indeed, its expiration date is most likely sometime between 2020 and 2022), and once people move on to 6e, or if 6e sucks they move on to Routelocator or whatever, my adventure library needs to be updated to the new edition or else it becomes near-worthless. People do occasionally buy third party adventures for deprecated editions, but it definitely won’t be enough for me to draw continuous income from my backlog through those means. If writing adventures is going to make up a significant portion of my creative income, it needs to be bringing in enough money to do that based on new releases. Right now, it looks like it’s probably barely covering expenses.

On the other hand: Books. Books – particularly ebooks, which is definitely what I’d be doing – tend to make between $3-$4 per sale rather than $14-$17. On the other hand, not only do books almost never go through edition changes, books have considerably lower initial costs. I need only a single cover illustration, much lighter formatting work, and require at most one map, often none at all, and certainly require no tokens. The bigger my audience gets, the more the higher price point but higher initial costs of an adventure makes sense, but real life has terrible game balance and the audience for books is actually considerably wider, even considering the niche genres I’d be writing in.

So, writing books is probably the way to go here, even though it can’t draw anything except seed money from my professional GMing success.

Cyberpunk Deck

Back in the first year of this blog, when I was absolutely committed to doing the blog-a-day thing once a day for an entire year, I churned out a lot of junk. Ultimately I think it was worth it. The junk fell into the archives and ultimately hurt no one, while the good articles that got squeezed out in between form a foundation of interesting posts I can show people. Back in the day, if I knew I wasn’t going to be able to post the article I planned, I’d slap something together in 30 minutes. Now, I’m already two days past when I planned my ongoing Immortal Cure posts would be out, but it occurs to me that I could probably slam out a pair of cheap better-than-nothing articles to have something to replace them (in the sense that given a choice between reading the article and staring at a wall for the same amount of time, most people would read the article). I’m told that back in, like, 2008 or something, these 300-800 word blog posts is what blogging was all about, and my 2,000-word articles would face incessant demands for tl;dr.

So here’s number one of those, and maybe I’ll figure out number two sometime, I dunno. I got this cyberpunk deck of cards from a Kickstarter I backed, though. They’re good cards and I like them. There’s a lot of good art, but my favorite might be the one that’s just labeled “your card,” so you can literally deal out cards until “your card” comes up.

Brief Intermission

I am announcing a brief intermission after it is already over instead of when it began. The reason why I’ve missed a few days of review articles is mainly because I was working on an outline for a novel and also deciding that I really don’t want to bother with this whole board game let’s play podcast thing. I liked the first one, but the overall quality trend has been downward, especially for something that takes so much time and effort to assemble, and I don’t think I’ll be saving it. Regardless, reviews will resume on Saturday.

FanX 2019

There was no FanX in 2018. Well, there sort of was. Originally, the Salt Lake Comic Con ran in September and the Salt Lake FanX, run by the same people, ran in April. The San Diego Comic Con sued them, and after several years, the courts somehow came to the conclusion that the San Diego Comic Con could trademark a name they had made no effort to protect for decades. So the 2018 September convention was called FanX, but I still call it the Comic Con, partly because that court decision was bonkers and partly because I don’t want to specify between FanX Spring 2019 and the upcoming FanX Fall 2019. So we’re calling the fall event Comic Con, and these photos come from FanX.

IMG_20190419_121402
The Princess and the Frog was an underrated movie.

 

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The Immortal Cure: I Guess We Care About Gregor Now

Chapter 7

Alister is distracting the chimera in a manner that just so happens to require Charlotte to take her clothes off. Probably we’ll see how Victorian her undergarments are at some point. For now, Alister is swearing poorly.

This is the most eternally damned thing I have ever done.

Trying to adapt swears from regular English, where they’re largely religious, to worlds with different religions or none at all can be tricky, but it’s not just that “eternally damned” doesn’t roll off the tongue very well. Translate that into regular Earth swears and look at it:

This is the most goddamned thing I have ever done.

Clearly, CJ Olsen is just continuing his tribute to Brandon Sandersen by imitating his inability to swear from Sandersen’s early career.

Continue reading “The Immortal Cure: I Guess We Care About Gregor Now”

The Immortal Cure: Escape From Megacity One

Chapter 5

It’s tomorrow and Charlotte is heading to the library to speak with Jonathon. Look at the way it’s framed, though:

Traumatized, Charlotte had decided that in the morning she would speak to the only person she thought could help.

Jonathon.

Now, I’ve read the back of the book and I know that Alister and Charlotte both get name dropped in capital letters and Jonathon is not even mentioned. Plus, in Jonathon’s previous appearance, he assumed that Charlotte was researching alchemy out of a desire to better understand and be closer to Harthum. What I’m saying here is that while it’s possible Jonathon is arranging to have her smuggled to safety, I’m not gonna be as shocked as the book wants me to be when he instead turns out to be evil. The whole “Jonathon is my only friend” thing not only gets dropped here, but emphasized again on the next page. There’s really only one place this could be going, dramatically. If Charlotte were all “is anyone in this city trustworthy? Is Jonathon in on it, too?!” then I’d actually be uncertain, ’cause that one could go either way.

“Do not be afraid Lady Lotte,” he interrupted with a reassuring smile. “This is a time to celebrate. The Lord Eternal has chosen you as his next consort. I knew he would!”

Charlotte straightened in shock as Jonathon kneeled in front of her and took her hand. “You have been blessed,” he said excitedly. “You have been chosen by the Hero of Eternity.” He looked into her eyes. “He deserves you,” he said with the same sickening smile Lindris had given her the day before. “You will make him so happy.”

…I am alone

At least it was more subtle than I thought. I was bracing myself for some stunning moment of betrayal where Jonathon does a Hans-from-Frozen sudden reveal that he was a villain all along.

Continue reading “The Immortal Cure: Escape From Megacity One”

Kickstarter: Approaching the Finish

My Kickstarter is a little over a week from completion, is 88% funded, and is quite likely to hit 100% during the final 48 hours. The trouble is, the Pathfinder conversion stretch goal – which will likely bring in considerably more backing if hit before the final 48 hours – is still $550 out. The odds I’ll hit that in time to bring Pathfinder hopefuls in are pretty slim. Worse, some of my current backers may have backed only out of the expectation that the Pathfinder stretch goal will be hit, and back out when things get close to the finish with that stretch goal still out of reach. This could lead to new pledges and cancellations dueling one another, a duel that the new pledges could ultimately lose out on, bringing the campaign to an ignominious conclusion just as it seemed on the threshold of victory.

On the other hand, 48 hours is a long time, so if the final surge quickly carries me over the $2,000 funding goal, I can start posting to Pathfinder subreddits to try and get us up to that $2,300 stretch goal, and if I’m really lucky, what would ordinarily be the final surge could carry me to the $2,300 stretch goal in the penultimate 24 hours, allowing me to advertise the campaign in its final day to Pathfinder as “this is definitely getting a conversion” rather than “please back so that it will maybe get a conversion.” It’s still hypothetically possible that tipping over the Pathfinder conversion stretch goal at the eleventh hour could lead to enough backers pouring in to count the campaign as an unqualified success (when the campaign started, I pegged that number at 250 – enough to show signs that my audience was growing, which it needs to do in order to make this gig stable), but it’s not very likely.

If the project does end up funding but not hitting the Pathfinder stretch goal, I could run a separate quickstarter specifically to try and fund that conversion. This would require me to make a new Kickstarter campaign, which would be a hassle, but it would also give me fairly solid evidence of how big the Pathfinder audience really is. One possible reason why this Kickstarter has gone poorly compared to the last is because the Pathfinder audience is holding off until the conversion is locked in, and that I’d be doing much better had I gone with a higher initial goal and baked the Pathfinder conversion into the default project. The Pathfinder conversion quickstarter would give me pretty good evidence as to how much of the campaign’s comparatively limited success is due to that particular factor.

The Immortal Cure: Dinner With Sauron

Chapter 4

Charlotte is getting all gussied up for her evening with Daddy Sauron. Servants are compressing her body into that universal symbol of Victorian oppression of women, the corset.

Charlotte let out her breath as the three servants standing behind her pulled the corset strings tight. Charlotte felt her rib cage squeeze together, her breasts forcibly spilling out the top. It was extremely uncomfortable and she could barely manage to take a breath.

I wonder sometimes if the reason the references to Charlottes breasts stand out to me is just because A) I had come relatively recently off of a story where it had been a noticeable problem not long before I picked up the Immortal Cure, making me unusually aware, and B) I’d written about it in that first post, which fixed the hyper-awareness in my mind. Definitely it’s a common criticism that books often bring up a woman’s breasts often enough to distract from the narrative, but corsets were actually designed to accentuate breasts (as well as minimize the waist), and it’s not CJ Olsen’s fault that corsets became the universal symbol for Victorian oppression.

Then paragraphs like this bail me out.

Charlotte turned to the side, then twisted to see the back. She had told herself that she would control the outcome of this meeting. She had to show Harthum that he did not own her. But now, standing in a gown likely hand-picked by Harthum himself, Charlotte’s confidence wavered. The dress was gorgeous and, despite the fact that it’s design drew attention to her breasts, Charlotte loved it.

Continue reading “The Immortal Cure: Dinner With Sauron”